By the way, if you're on Twitter, and would like to contribute to a running list of "stupidest things you've heard someone in a LFG pug say," tag it with #pugbingo! Eventually, if I can find a list of 25 universal stupid-things-heard, I'll make a bingo card (or rather, will set something up to randomly generate a bingo card) and give prizes to people who manage to make a bingo. ^_^

"L.O.S." = line of sight.  If you lose line of sight to a target, you can't cast a spell at it or otherwise affect it.

"S.O.S." = my favorite ABBA song.

"L.O.S.", a filk by Teuthida of Feathermoon

Where is that buffed-up tank?
He seems so hard to find
I tried to throw a heal,
but there is no sight line!
Why did he move from off his spot?
I cannot understand!
We had it set up nice,
so all our heals would land!

When we can't see ya, darlin', we can't heal ya!
L.O.S.!
The heals won't find ya if we have no sight lines!
L.O.S.!
When you're gone
Up those stairs
We all panic and run
When you're gone
We stab "heal"
Nothing lands and we're done!

You seem so far away
Though you are standing near
We heal so you might live,
But you will die, we fear!
We know you can't stand in the clouds,
Or flame waves or void zones,
But if we see you not,
O, Tank, you will be pwned!

When we can't see ya, darlin', we can't heal ya!
L.O.S.!
The heals won't find ya if we have no sight lines!
L.O.S.!
When you're gone
Round the corner
We panic and run
When you're gone
Though we try
We can't heal and we're done!
When you're gone
Up those stairs
We all panic and run
When you're gone
We stab "heal"
Nothing lands and we're done!
When you're gone
Round the corner
We panic and run
When you're gone
Though we try
We can't heal and we're done!

If your "alt" gets to go raiding while your "main" only gets brought in to buff the raid with Spirit (and only then when the disc priest is out sick), you may have a new main.

If you have to change your screen name from your "main" to your "alt" on your raiding board so people will know who the heck you are, you may have a new main.

If the new expansion comes out and your "alt" hits 80 before your "main" hits 71, you may have a new main.

If you're still not sure what the 51-point talents for your "main" are, let alone what they do, you may have a new main.

If your "alt" hits 450 cooking, fishing, and first aid before your "main" even sees a scrap of Frostweave -- even though she's a tailor -- you may have a new main.

If your "main" is wearing heirloom items she got from your "alt", you may have a new main.

If you roll a second version of your "alt" so she can level up side-by-side with the toon she leveled 1-70 with (in other words, you have a second version of your "alt" purely for RP reasons), you may have a new main.

And, most relevant today,

If you get absurdly, ridiculously excited over registering and setting up a domain and email address which are 100% associated with something your "alt" once said... but you have absolutely no urge to register a domain for your "main", even though you can think of the perfect domain name¹, you may have a new main.

I no longer try to deny that Teuthida (and not Ovistine) is my main, but it was a long time before I could admit it! At first, I called her my "raiding main" (Ovistine was still my "RP main"). But at this point, I've put as much thought into Teu's backstory as Ovi's, and I've rolled a second Teu in order to play her with her companion Valyrie.

It's funny that it wasn't hard to admit this before. My first main was Agnesdea, a human priest who now lives on Sisters of Elune. I was happy to make Ovistine my main; this was back in the days when being a dwarf priest mattered a lot to a raiding team. Not only that, I'd gotten into some lovely RP with the foremost dwarven guild on my server, so Ovi had plenty to do! At first I didn't think I had too many priests (Agness stayed shadow, Ovi was Disc/Holy), but eventually -- and especially with the upcoming dual-spec ability -- Agness got re-rolled as a warlock. I'm perfectly happy with that.

But I do miss the twirly braids sometimes. In fact, when hairdressers came in, I took Teu to a barbershop and got her as close to braids as I could get (pigtails). I'm pretty sure twirly braids add a significant amount to healing, and pigtails come close.

At any rate, welcome to SandwichRations.com! I'm pretty thrilled to have this domain set up. And if I end up with a new main sometime in the future... well, she'll have to learn to pack picnic baskets, that's all.

^1: "twirlybraids.com"

Her greeting is often "Salutings!", but then there was the time she tried to correct "salutings" to "salutations" -- and totally missed. Instead, she said "Greetings and sandwich rations!"

Friend: ...I think ye've got that a bit mixed up, Teu.
Teuthida: Oh, oh, I meant...
Friend: I like sandwich rations.
Teuthida: *cheerfully* Well! In that case, it is exactly what I meant! Greetings and sandwich rations!

After LK came out, I ended up fishing. And fishing. And fishing some more. Go figure -- I seem to really like fishing now. It may have something to do with the fact that fishing produces such awesome food -- including food that replenishes mana! Anyway, for raids, she generally has a fish buffet... but with mages around, those can easily be turned into "sandwich rations".

And thus, "sandwich rations" has become one of the keywords that goes along with Teuthida in my head.

(I pondered a lot of other blog titles -- things like Braids and Blastings, Beer and Squid, HealHealHealHealHeal, and so on, but "Sandwich Rations" is weird and unique and makes no sense whatsoever, which I find really appealing for some reason. )