Dimensional Ripping For Dummies

"So the way I see it is this," Ovistine said, drink in hand, looking more cheerful and animated than Valinar had seen her in ages. "The goblin-type engineers have this whatnot called a Dimensional Ripper, am I right?"

"Well, yes."

"An' you've got to figure they have — well, dimensions, aye? That they rip people through?"

Valinar's left ear twitched. "Yes…"

"An' — now, follow me on this one — presumably those other dimensions have folks like us in 'em, aye? Or else when we ripped through 'em, we'd just go POOF."

"I'm not so certain about that," Valinar said, but Ovistine was already waving a hand, braids flapping out to her sides.

"So what I'm thinking is: I hook up a dimensional ripper. I use Gnomish technology to pick which dimension. An' I find a dimension where I'm still connected to the Light, an' I use a Dimensional Self-Re-Compactor to squish us together."

Both of Valinar's ears twitched at that. "What exactly is a 'dimensional self-re-compactor'?"

"Oh, that. It's a thing I whipped up to join different whatsits from different dimensions, giving 'em the best of all possible worlds."

"You've tested this?"

"You should see the beer it made," Ovistine said dreamily. "Anywho, so I zap myself through the Dimensional Ripper, an' then you come an' meet me in Everlook, an' we'll see if it took. Sound reasonable?"

Valinar was silent for long enough that Ovistine actually stopped drinking and looked up at him, eyes wide. "Val…?"

"Are you really certain that goblin technology is the answer to your… problem?" Valinar reached out and put his hand on Ovistine's, and she slipped her fingers between his. "You made a worthy sacrifice for all the best of reasons. I know it's difficult, but surely there are answers apart from bringing other dimensions into the equation. What about Uldaman? Ulduar? There are so many things we don't know about dwarves, especially now that we do know about your origins as a race–what about your stoneform? It's always enabled you to heal from diseases, or poisons, or–"

Ovistine pulled her hand away from Valinar's, frowning. "Are you saying… you're not going to be there? When I go?"

"I wish you'd reconsider."

"Oh, aye, the way you 'reconsidered' when you got an axe that sucks people's souls out at the root–"

Valinar shook his head. "We've talked about this. It wasn't like that–"

"It was just like that," Ovistine growled under her breath. "It was–" Her angry mutters slipped into Dwarvish, as they tended to do; Valinar knew plenty to keep up, even with that tone in her voice. "It was just like that, and there you were, week after week, coming out wounded and me not even going through the gates because we didn't think I could help…"

Valinar reached out and took Ovistine's hand again, squeezing her fingers tightly. "It's over now," he said; his Dwarvish still had an accent, but it got her attention. "It's over, and your memories are back for good. We're safe."

"Safe!" Ovistine snorted, but at least she was back to speaking Common again. "Safe with red dragons and Mum still at the tournament grounds snapping at the Horde and–Val, when have we ever been safe enough we could afford to lose a healer? When?"

Valinar shook his head. The fact that she brought Nancie up now seemed very telling; following in her mother's footsteps–and the fact that now she couldn't–was undoubtedly part of all this. Not to mention the fact that Ovistine came by her stubbornness very naturally, not that he'd say so to either one of the Lighthammer women.

"I'll meet you in Everlook," Valinar sighed. "With a few buckets of water."

Ovistine sighed, too. "Thank you."

* * *

It was cold in Everlook despite the season; Valinar was grateful for his Ultrasafe Pocket Warmers and the earwarmers Ovistine had so earnestly knit for him a few winters back. The earwarmers reached halfway to the ground, but better too long than too short, after all.

"I'm ready," he said into the buzzbox. "Are you set up?"

"Aye, I'm here with Donova," Ovistine answered, voice a bit tinny, as usual.

"Nae fears, lad," Donova Snowden said; she sounded downright cheerful. "If she catches fire, I'll dip 'er intae th' hot springs!"

"Very funny," Ovistine said.

"Well, it's why we're out here, eh? Fire safety an' all. Why ye've got t' use goblin crap, I–"

"Ma'am! Please! I'm ready now!"

"Oh, aye, big hurry t' set yerself aflame–"

"I'm not going to catch fire!" Ovistine yelled, and Valinar held the buzzbox at arm's length, wishing he had such confidence. "I'm bloody well invincible! Just be ready when I pop out on the other end, aye? An' three… two… one…"

There was a loud poof, a pair of female screams, and then alarms were going off at the transporter in Everlook; several goblins rushed over to see what was happening. Valinar was shoved away, and as the puffs of smoke billowed out over Everlook, he couldn't help but think to himself: I saw it coming.

Except that as the smoke cleared, he realized that no: no, he really hadn't.

Jul 23rd, 2010
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